sweet like honey.

Honey. Babe. Buttercup. Pumpkin. Cookie. Sweetie. Sweetheart. Sugar.

The list of endearments is infinitely long and all are sickly sweet or ridiculously lyrical. Everyone who is within earshot of the term (whichever it may be) is almost certainly going to have to check their gag reflex for fear of actual expulsion of their recently consumed meal. Only the one on the receiving end is oblivious to the complete and utter inappropriateness of the words in the situation. As you may have gathered, I’m not the biggest fan of PDA (Public Displays of Affection) and the use of endearments comes under that title. I’m not a total heartless prick though. I can just about accept “babe” in mixed company. “Babe”, yes; “baby”, no. It’s like, we already know you’re an item by your body language (from close proximity to holding hands, to everything but sexual intercourse on the streets). So we don’t need you to reiterate your point by then calling each other “cookie” or “sugarplum”. It’s just not necessary, and downright wrong.

Another annoying thing about endearments is that it is now more and more common to extend the usage outside of romantic relationships. I have been called “babe” and “hun” by complete strangers and the experience always leaves me feeling confused and rather angry. I am not your “baby”. Stop being so condescending you little queen, and just give me my drink! Argh! What is with all this over-friendliness and pretend familiarity? Why can’t we just return to the good ol’ days where we just beat each other up?